LETTING COMPASSION OPEN THE DOOR
I seem to be having a lot of conversations with friends about parenting lately. I am not a parent so I do not have much to offer these conversations. In my heart, I imagine how challenging it is to be a parent right now as well as a kid.
I work with hundreds of kids each year however and the message they tell me always is that the adult world doesn’t always makes a lot sense to them and frequently scares them. Some act out in anger, many try to escape. Most want to be understood and respected and struggle with their experiments to do so.
So many parents seem to be struggling to make ends meet and are in a deep tactical (logistical) mindset feeling exhausted trying to make each day work with never enough time. When a kid acts out or doesn’t play well with the schedule it creates great frustration on everyone’s parts.
While I am not a child or parent expert, I do remind myself daily to love my friends both young and old from a place of empathy and wonder, which feel like essential elements of compassion.
As someone who wanders the Earth often, less judgment and more curiosity grounded in compassion seems to always create more authentic connection.
The Dalai Lama reminds us often that compassion is the key to opening doors to understanding. Of course, this is all theology to people who are striving to survive right now so practical applications and experiments seem critical to develop. Given that kids are often the experts on being kids, whether they can articulate their insights or not. I am listening. Not just to their words, but to their hearts.
THE PERFECT HEART
The perfect heart doesn’t need to be a perfect lover, friend, or parent. It just needs to be oriented to authentic love. With authentic love you experience every human emotion you can and still show up day after day with compassion. Compassion is the key which includes self-compassion as well as a deep abiding care for other’s journeys.
Orient your heart compass towards authentic love and you will always find your way.
